MAKE TIME FOR “YOU”
Do you recall looking after yourself when you were pregnant?
You ate healthy, got regular exercise, slept well – you felt the NEED to take the best possible care of yourself because you had a baby growing inside of you.
Fast forward a couple of years and you are still taking the best possible care of your children. But what about YOU?
The only real difference now is that your children are growing outside of your body – but taking care of YOU is still important to be able to take care of them. And in watching you, they continue to grow.
What do you want them to see?
While going through life, particularly motherhood, it’s important to appreciate that it is not possible to fit in everything – so you have to make choices.
Choose to live deliberately – in doing so you are choosing to live the life YOU want.
PRIORITISE the top things that need to get done and the rest will have to wait for another day. In every choice you make there is a compromise – it’s up to you to recognise what is important and what you are willing to let go of. Each stage and sometimes each day, comes with its own challenges and it’s important to keep reassessing our priorities.
PLAN AHEAD: Take a few minutes each morning or the night before – to plan your day ahead. Making a note of all the things that need to get done and setting reminders, not only helps you be more prepared, but also helps you manage your time better. Like planning a birthday party – when you make a plan it’s so much easier to handle all the many things that need to be put together. And this leaves you much calmer and on top of things on the day of the party.
BE PRESENT: When you are trying to do too many things at the same time it can be hard to be present. When with the children, when at work, at the store, with your partner, in the kitchen, or doing chores – minimize the distractions and stay within each space as much as possible. Putting things down, and just knowing you have a plan of what needs to be done in each of these spaces, can help you stay in the moment.
BUILD YOUR VILLAGE – Sometimes as moms we tend to think that only we can do things the way they need to be done. And while that might even be true sometimes – you need to build your own support systems. A lot of us find it hard to ask for help and reach out to others, but you need people to take over for you every once in a while. If it makes you feel less guilty offer your help and take help in return. You will be surprised how something as simple as carpooling school pickups and drops can give you more time. While building your support system what you are also building is a support system for your children. You are allowing them to build relationships with grandparents, aunts, friends – all of whom they will know they too can fall back on.
Through all the highs and the lows, and the squeals of laughter and the tears, DON’T LOSE YOU. And I am definitely not talking about your work. I’m talking about YOU. Your hobbies, journaling, girlfriends, dreams, goals – all of it – everything that makes you who you are. Bring them into your schedule and find ways to stay in touch with what is important to you – even if it is just once a week, at times.
Someone recently asked me if I had to strip myself of all the ‘roles’ that I play in my life – mother, daughter, wife, work, friend – all of it – what would I be left with?
Would I still recognise the person outside all my ‘roles’?
Would I still recognise ‘ME’?
That’s definitely a question worth asking ourselves.
if I had to strip myself of all the ‘roles’ that I play in my life – mother, daughter, wife, work, friend – all of it – what would I be left with? Would I still recognise the person outside all my ‘roles’?